Ep 72- Solving Challenging Behaviour (with Dr. Ross Greene)

89A1FF33-277B-4DB9-8D19-E6CB3C920B0Bhttps://itunes.apple.com/ca/podcast/kindsight-101/id1412489005?mt=2

If you are an educator, school administrator, parent, camp counsellor, or employer, chances are you’ve had experience with challenging behaviours.

So often, we focus on crisis-management and behaviour-modification to attempt to make challenging behaviours “go away,” but as we know, sticker charts and reward systems do little to encourage intrinsic motivation and, furthermore, do not address the underlying problems that cause the problematic behaviours.

I sat down with Dr. Ross Greene this summer to discuss his Collaborative and Proactive Solutions model in order to learn how we can solve some of the most challenging school behaviours.

Here are some things we discuss:

  • The Four Main Philosophies that guide Collaborative Proactive Solutions:
  1. Kids do well if they can.
  2. Your explanation guides your intervention.
  3. Be responsible to the hand you’ve been dealt.
  4. Challenging behaviours occur when certain demands and expectations exceed a kid’s ability to respond adaptively to their environment. It’s a method of communication.
  • The Three Main “Umbrella” Lagging Skills
  1. Flexibility/ Adaptability
  2. Frustration Tolerance
  3. Problem Solving
  • Inclusion through the lens of teaching lagging skills and taking an empathic approach to adapting to problems integrating 100% of the time within the classroom for 100% of tasks
  • The Most Important Skill for an educator to lead with
  • A Step-by-Step Framework to Implement CPS  
    1. Empathy Step: Information gathering from the student- “What is hard for you about___? How does that make it hard for you to ____?”
    2. Define Adult Concerns: Explain and articulate adult expectations
    3. Invitation: Collaboration on a solution (having the student come up with some possible solutions to the problem and coming to a realistic, mutually satisfactory solution. “I wonder if there is something we can do about ____ do that you can ____? Do you have any ideas?”
  • A Real World Example of CPS in Action: Dr. Greene takes us through a step-by-step example of the process
  • Dr. Ross Greene answers 2 audience questions related to: 
    • Teen peer pressure
    • School-Family Partnerships
  • Dr. Ross Greene’s book recommendation: Sara Laurence Lightfoot‘s The Essential Conversation

Dr. Ross W. Greene is the author of Raising Human Beings, Lost and Found, Lost at School, and The Explosive Child. Dr. Greene was on the faculty at Harvard Medical School for over twenty years, and is now founding director of the nonprofit organization Lives in the Balance (LivesintheBalance.org), through which he disseminates the model of care—now called Collaborative & Proactive Solutions—described in his books. Dr. Greene’s research has been funded by the US Department of Education, the National Institute on Drug Abuse, the Stanley Medical Research Institute, and the Maine Juvenile Justice Advisory Group. He speaks widely throughout the world.

“We cannot solve problems with the same thinking that created them.”
Albert Einstein


Lives in the Balance
 is the non-profit organization founded by child psychologist Dr. Ross Greene, originator of the empirically supported Collaborative & Proactive Solutions (CPS) approach and New York Times bestselling author of the influential books The Explosive Child, Lost at SchoolLost & Found, and Raising Human Beings. 

Their vision is to foster collaboration and empathy, transform lives, and inspire change for all children (especially the most vulnerable), to heighten awareness of the detrimental and counterproductive effects of punitive interventions, and to address the systemic issues that impede our progress.

The mission of Lives in the Balance is to provide vital, accessible resources and programs to caregivers of behaviorally challenging kids; to bring the plight of these kids into the public consciousness; to address the systemic issues that cause many of these kids to slip through the cracks; and to promote parenting and disciplinary practices that foster the better side of human nature in all children. Their efforts are organized around the following initiatives:

Open Access: Through their Outreach initiatives — which include their website, their radio programs and Facebook groups, and their annual Summit — we ensure that parents, educators, mental health clinicians, and staff in restrictive therapeutic facilities have easy access to vast resources on the CPS model at little or no cost.

Lead the Change: Through their Advocacy efforts, they heighten awareness of the obsolete, counterproductive ways in which many behaviorally challenging kids are still treated; take action whenever we learn of schools and facilities that are treating kids — behaviorally challenging or not — in ways that are punitive, adversarial, and counterproductive; and provide consultation and training on non-punitive, non-adversarial, collaborative, proactive alternatives.

Fix The System: Through their proof-of-concept project — Invest in Maine’s At-Risk Kids (i-MARK) — we’re showing how a public-private partnership can eliminate many of the systemic issues that make it hard for at-risk kids and their families to access and receive the help they need. Once we’ve shown what can be done in one state, we’ll export the model to other states, provinces, and countries.

Lives in the Balance is a registered 501(c)(3) non-profit organization and your gift may qualify as a charitable deduction for federal income tax purposes. Our programs are funded by Dr. Greene and other philanthropic individuals and organizations. If you’re interested in supporting their vision and mission, please contact them by phone or by using the contact form on their website.

Byron Katie and Oprah’s Supersoul Conversations

oprah_winfreypic

I was recently listening to Oprah Winfrey’s Supersoul Conversations Podcast (which is amazing, BTW) and stumbled upon a conversation with Byron Katie about a really fascinating way that we can elongate the space between stimulus and response (a Viktor Frankel reference about the way that we can have more ownership and agency over the way we react to the challenges that life hands us).

She has a great 4-question framework that has done wonders in terms of re-thinking the worst-case scenario narratives that often start ramping up when things go sideways. I wanted to share them with YOU!

Imagine you’ve made plans with someone and you just can’t seem to get ahold of them. Perhaps, you start thinking that they are trying to avoid you or, worse, you think that something terrible has happened to them. Whatever your thought cycle, here’s a framework that can help you to dig yourself out:

  1. Is it true? Can I absolutely know that this is TRUTH? This is likely a story I am telling myself about what might have happened. 
  2. How can I check that this is true? I could call. I could think back to past behaviours to see what might be in line with who this person usually is. 
  3. How do I react when I believe this to be true? Unkind? Vengeful? Tearful? Guilty? Mind attack? Certainty-seeking? Imagining the worst?
  4. Who would you be without that thought? Peaceful. Trusting. Worthy. Enough. Faith-filled. 

The 7 Most Effective Work Questions (Gallup Poll)

woman standing in front of sitting people
Photo by rawpixel.com on Pexels.com

Here is a list of the 7 most important questions that enable you to evaluate whether your work is a good fit for you. These questions can help you to determine your overall job satisfaction and fulfilment. These can also help a teacher to think empathetically through the eyes of her students, when we swap the word “school” for “work” :

  1. Do I know what’s expected of me at work?
  2. Do I have the materials and the equipments I need to do my work right?
  3. Do I have the opportunity to do that I do best every day?
  4. In the last 7 days, have I received recognition or praise for good work?
  5. Does my supervisor or someone at work seem to care about me as a person?
  6. Is there someone at work who encourages my development?
  7. What matters to me most about work and is that aligned with my duties?

When you’ve answered these questions, it’s important to evaluate how much you have within your sphere of control to change through your actions or by simply changing your mindset. Sometimes, questions like these can also be clarifying when it comes to checking whether or not your current employment is aligned with the direction you want your life to take.

E 69 – Everything is Figure-Outable (With Dan Buchner)

5413CE69-7887-4175-B72A-471EA653F0F2

https://itunes.apple.com/ca/podcast/kindsight-101/id1412489005?mt=2

Dan Buchner is an award winning designer, entrepreneur, educator, and leadership facilitator and the ceo of Praktikel.

He designed and delivered custom Innovation Leadership programs for leading organizations such as Baxter Healthcare, Eaton Corporation, McDonalds, General Motors and Robert Woods Johnson Foundation. Dan is a sought-after international keynote speaker and facilitator on innovation practices and organizational strategies. Thousands of people around the world have had their thinking shifted and been inspired to action by his practical perspective on innovation, leadership and organizational change.

I wanted to have Dan Buchner onto KindSight 101 to talk about the ways that innovation, leadership and learning interconnect within this global world and the ways that edcuators can foster environments that encourage creative thinking vs. compliance.

Everything is figureoutable.

In this episode, you’ll learn the step-by-step formula for figuring anything out. You’ll learn the one thing that every student needs for success in the real world and how you can be the one to help them acquire it.

– You’ll learn how to balance the need for organization and the drive for creativity.

– You’ll learn how balancing the need for creativity is like balancing your investment portfolio.

– You’ll learn the most important skill and trait a teacher needs to have to be effective.

What an inspiration!

E 68 – Self-Care through Visual Storytelling (With Deborah LeFrank)

1179CDA6-4256-4B65-A597-B3A02392F55D

https://itunes.apple.com/ca/podcast/kindsight-101/id1412489005?mt=2

Deborah Le Frank believes that inside every person – is a collection of stories and memories. Her job is to draw them out of her clients creating a visually engaging Visual Life Story that is deeply meaningful and creates a legacy and connection between generations.

With the recent popularity of sketchnoting in schools, I wanted to have her on the show to talk about the different ways that we can use visuals to tell a compelling story about ourselves and our students. We learn the three life lessons that can help us live a fuller life and to help our students to do the same for themselves.

– We learn the significant moment in Deborah’s life that made her change the way she looked at the way we create and hang on to our memories.
– Some practical ways to invite sketch-noting into our lives.
– Compelling reasons to record a story from your life every month!
– The power of sketch-noting as a method to enable learners to capture their connections and realizations in a more full way.

You can find out more about her at [Visual Life Stories][1]
[1]: http://visuallifestories.com

Summer 2019 KindSight 101 Booklist

book-stackSummertime and the living is easy…

Here we are, hopefully one step closer to relaxation than we were back in June. It occurred to me a while back that it would be fun to share a few of my favourite books about school, kids, kindness, and the human condition. I can’t promise that it’s all light reading, but I always love the aha’s I come away with when I read a good non-fiction book.

These books aren’t alphabetical…or even in any particular order of importance. I haven’t even gone through and curated the list or annotated the titles…but I have created a list of books that have changed my life (one paradigm at a time).

Hope you enjoy at least one of these titles during these beautiful summer months:

  • Simon Sinek, Leaders Eat Last
  • Simon Sinek, Start with Why
  • Bob Chapman, Everybody Matters
  • Elizabeth Gilbert, Big Magic
  • Stephen Pressfield, The War of Art
  • Seth Godin, The Dip
  • Seth Godin, Purple Cow
  • Seth Godin, Linchpin
  • Seth Godin, This is Marketing
  • Glennon Doyle Melton, Love Warrior
  • Dr. Brene Brown, Rising Strong
  • Dr. Brene Brown, Gifts of Imperfection
  • Dr. Brene Brown, Braving the Wilderness
  • Dr. Brene Brown, Dare to Lead
  • Dan and Chip Heath, The Power of Moments
  • Dan and Chip Heath, Ideas that Stick
  • Trevor Mckenzie, Dive into Inquiry
  • Trevor Mckenzie and Rebecca Bathurst-Hunt, Inquiry Mindset
  • Dan Pink, When
  • Dan Pink, Drive
  • Dan Pink, A Whole New Mind
  • Tim Ferriss, Tools of Titans
  • Tim Ferriss, 4 Hour Work Week
  • Susan Cain, Quiet
  • Dr. Jody Carrington, Kids These Days
  • Tamara Letter, Passion for Kindness
  • George Couros, Innovator’s Mindset
  • Teach Like a Pirate, Dave Burgess
  • Principal Baruti Kafele, Closing the Attitude Gap
  • Shawn Achor, The Happiness Advantage
  • Dr. Shimi Kang, The Dolphin Way
  • Dr. Adam Grant, Give and Take
  • Dr. Adam Grant and Sheryl Sandberg, Option B
  • Dr. Adam Grant, Originals
  • Sheryl Sandberg, Lean-In
  • Malcolm Gladwell, The Tipping Point
  • Malcolm Gladwell, David and Goliath
  • Malcolm Gladwell, Outliers
  • Dr. Ross Greene, Lost at School
  • Dr. Ross Greene, The Explosive Child

 

E 67 – How to be a Connection Ninja (With David Knapp-Fisher)

D0A12E7D-C01A-48CB-B0A0-88F7C67E798E

How do you make authentic connections with people?

How can we teach kids to do the same?

What are some of the keys that will enable students to be successful in the uncertain future world they face?

https://itunes.apple.com/ca/podcast/kindsight-101/id1412489005?mt=2

I want to introduce you to my friend, David Knapp-Fisher, a connection ninja, speaker, author, world-traveller, and speaking coach.

In this episode, we talk about his journey as an advocate for his son living through muscular dystrophy, what it takes to set and achieve audacious goals, how self-education is the key to the future, the importance of service and gratitude in helping you get where you want, and the four steps to creating lasting connections with the people you serve.

We’ll talk about simple ways you can improve your (and your student’s) speaking through an easy formula.

We talk about the following game-changing books and authors:

– Tim Ferriss (Tools of Titans, 4 Hour Work Week)
– Richard Branson
– Tony Robbins
– Marc Marron
– Thoreau (Waldon)
– Mike Vardy
– Janelle Morrison
– Chris Gillebeau
– Jerry Lewis
– Jim Rohn

Can’t wait to hear your takeaways from this action-packed podcast.

Check out his TED talk here: https://youtu.be/t186tlhjvMk

Check out his website here: http://davidknappfisher.com

Favourite Mantras for the Classroom

I was inspired to create this post after hearing an episode of Barbara Gruener’s Corner on Character  podcast episodes.

One of her guests talked about the power of mantras in helping to form a positive and encouraging classroom culture. I loved the idea. While I have strong values, I haven’t always articulated these into classroom mantras so that kids could hear how much I love, appreciate them, and how we can train our brains to overcome the tough stuff- the dips in life.

So, here are a few of my favourite mantras for the classroom. I hope you’ll share some of your own with me, too!

  • I am surrounded by greatness!
  • I am full of gratitude!
  • Don’t give up, don’t give in, there’s always an answer to everything.
  • There are no mistakes in art!
  • I loved you before you even showed up.
  • Listen to your heart; it will never let you down.
  • Kindness is better than getting your own way.
  • Fail gloriously!
  • Judge less, love more.
  • Do it and forget it.
  • It’s not what you do, it’s what you don’t do that counts.
  • You write the ending to your story.
  • There’s always something to be grateful for.
  • Start each day with a grateful heart.
  • If you can say it, you can write it.
  • You can do this!
  • I believe in you!
  • I am so proud of you!

What are some of your favourite mantras?

E 66 – Choose to Rise (With Janelle Morrison)

IMG_6516

https://itunes.apple.com/ca/podcast/kindsight-101/id1412489005?mt=2We all have those moments, real life crashes that provide us with an opportunity to choose fear or choose to rise above the adversity and find a way to move forward. What does it take to be a real hero?

How can we learn to rise above our circumstances, teaching our students to do the same, while balancing an attitude of self-compassion and patience?

In this episode, I talk with Janelle Morrison, an ultra marathoner and educator who beat the odds recovering and racing again 2 years after a devastating crash landed her in the ICU in a coma with a broken bones throughout her body.

You’ll hear the surprising thing she learned about self-compassion and what it takes to be a true hero.

We talk perfectionism, heartbreak, and overcoming adversity and how we can help our students to become their best selves while holding onto a sense of unconditional acceptance of themselves no matter their situation. You can learn more about Janelle on janellemorrison.com.

Also, take some time to view the film documenting her recovery and journey.

Hope you enjoy.

– You’ll learn how to rebuild after a crash.
– Some practical ways that we can choose to rise.
– You’ll learn advice for setting powerful goals that strike a balance between being audacious, healthy and realistic.
– We talk about the power of hope and fear in propelling us forward.
-We talk about the three essential questions everyone needs to ask themselves during a crisis of identity.
-We explore the secret to stopping your own limiting thoughts and behaviour in order to realign yourself with your goals and vision.

The Power to Choose.

#choosetorise
[1]: http://www.janellemorrison.com
[2]: http://www.janellemorrison.com/documentary-film/

 

The 4 Secrets to Effective Teaching

IMG_6802.jpg

Picture for a moment, your ideal student. As Dan and Chip Health counsel us to do in their ground-breaking book The Power of Moments, fill in the following sentence with what makes sense to you:

Three-to -Five years from now, my students still know_____, are still able to do _____, or will continue to find value in _________.

Great teachers or mentors manage to maintain high expectations for their students, expressing the knowledge they have that their students will be capable of meeting those high expectations, and that if failure should come knocking, that they will be there to support the recovery.

When we are able to stand alongside a student with our unwavering belief in them, great things can happen. Students can develop an enhanced self-insight and self-worth that will serve them forever.

“I expect you to do X and I believe you have the power, intelligence, and ability to do so. I will be here alongside you should you need my guidance or support. I believe in you more than you know!”

What do you want your students to come away from your class knowing or being able to do? How might this apply to your role as the parent of your children?

 

%d bloggers like this: